AdScam

Gas prices aren’t the only item inflicting financial strain on Americans ahead of Memorial Day. For families firing up the grill, that ground beef will have a higher price tag attached to it. MAGA Morans can expect to pay $6.90 a pound. Since Der Trumpf took office in January 2025, ground beef prices have climbed by 24%. Let them eat cake!

Welcome to Wendy’s!

Maison Perrier is is claiming that it is bringing a taste of Parisian romance to the beverage aisle with its new U.S. campaign. “Can’t Kiss? French Kiss Instead,” for its French Kiss Sparkling Juice Beverage. We are told that the pathetic campaign, from Ogilvy, plays off “the French reputation for romance and sensuality,” by showing various missed romantic connections between strangers. In “Hotel,” seen here, a revolving door in a Parisian hotel keeps two would-be lovers apart. In “Metro,” seen here, two strangers pass each other on different trains going in opposite directions. catching only a brief, but meaningful, glimpse of one another. Both ads conclude with the line, “Can’t kiss? French kiss instead.” Total rubbish!

I’d rather have a Kate Kiss!!!

Ad Age tells us that Subway is overhauling its U.S. marketing and agency roster, throwing its global chief marketing officer under the bus, appointing a new U.S. CMO, and shaking up both its media and creative accounts. We are told that they are doing this in order to solve the brand’s ‘emotional resonance’ problem. Whatever the fuck that means. How about selling more sandwiches?

Subway’s new CMO!

Anyone notice that on Der Trumpf’s visit to China, all the Americans wear flag pins. The Chinese do not. Maybe they don’t have to remind the world where they are from. Also, many of the pictures from Tehran during the current “War.” The one we were going to win on day one… show some of the women on the street without head coverings. Weren’t we told they could be executed for that?

She’s OK. Her head is covered!

The Iran war has wreaked havoc on global supply chains, caused a spike in oil prices and scrambled international trade. Now, it is fucking up Japans lust for potato chips. The Japanese food giant Calbee said on Tuesday that it would temporarily abandon its brightly colored plastic snack bags in favor of black-and-white wrapping because of “instability affecting certain raw materials amid ongoing tensions in the Middle East.”

Bonzai!!

Super ex-MAGA queen, Marjorie Taylor Greene Singles Out $920 Million Worth Of Crude Oil Shorts And Says On-Again, Off-Again War Rhetoric Is Just “Insider Trading.” She posts… When is everyone going to start realizing that the manic on again off again war/peace rhetoric is really just insider trading? And sprinkle in some murder.
Only a select few in the top tax bracket are benefiting from this, and the majority of you ain’t in it. https://t.co/tJXLeUbUEb

A Queen indeed!

Don’t forget, tomorrow is Mothers Day. Yet again another fake holiday that allows American punters to blow all that free Trumpf tariff dosh on useless shit. Apparently, the top gifts for Mother’s Day in 2026 will include flowers (75%), greeting cards (74%), special outings (63%), and gift cards (55%). Proving that our love for Mom is at an all-time high. We are looking at spending estimates that will break records in 2026, rising from $34.1 billion in 2025 to an estimated $38 billion for this year. 

Some Mum’s try harder…

FBI Chief wanker, Kash “Look me in the eyes… If you dare” Patel, not content with getting pissed and passing out on the job, has now had his own custom brand of bourbon created. No doubt using tax payer dollars. No doubt being sipped with agent guarded and chauffeured girl friend.

Have you got a bigger glass?

There are rumors that Amazon is thinking about reviving one of the world’s crapiest TV shows, “The Apprentice.” One reason floated or implied in the WSJ story and other news stories that followed the story was that Amazon wants to curry favor with the Trump administration. No shit Sherlock. Bezos already has his tongue so far up Der Trumpf’s arse, it’s coming out of his ears. Never forget, he coughed up $70 million on “Melania.”

Melania discovers Donald’s Dick!

Whilst solving his 31st world war, curing cancer, stopping Tylenol from killing children, and blocking, unblocking, then re-blocking the Straight of Hormuz, Der Trumpf managed to spend all Saturday playing golf. We are told he is expected to do the same today.

How about the next three years?